Early afternoon I had wandered by Westlake. There was a crowd of protesters, but people yards away seemed oblivious. Tonight on my mailing lists I read about police, tear gas, etc. And it seems so quiet here at home....

"I like the way you simplify things... there's normal cheese and different cheese :)" – Andrew

Yay! for ramen... ramen cooked naked in front of an open window. (4:40am)

> fortune cookies!
<dilinger> ooh
<dilinger> where?
> next to my chair
> "All your hard work will pay off"
<dilinger> ....in bed?
> "You are a bundle of energy, always on the go"
<dilinger> ... on the subway?

I think it's time, since Izzy never gave me my three Izzy-clones, to take his (and her X-Files collection!!)

I'm not sure how to react to this—I challenged Andrew to trade boots with me at the Vogue (giving him my realli nice five-inch heels, and he can dance in the better than I can!

I forgot to mention—I've been told I'm just a character in DLlamar's dream and I'll stop existing when he wakes up. No one else has to worry though. He says the real world is exactly the same except that I don't exist.

Weird little test at ColorQuiz.com. It gave me all this based off the colors that make me feel the best.

Your Existing Situation

Willing and adaptable. Only at peace when closely attached to a person, group, or organization on a which reliance can be placed.

Your Stress Sources

Feels unappreciated and finds the existing situation threatening. Wants personal recognition and the esteem of others to compensate for the lack of like-minded people with whom to ally herself and make herself more secure. Her sensual self-restraint makes it difficult for her to give herself, but the resulting isolation leads to the urge to surrender and merge with another. This disturbs her as she regards such instincts as weaknesses to be overcome; only by not succumbing to them, she feels, can she withstand the difficulties of the situation. Wants to be valued as a desirable associate and admired for her personal qualities.

Your Restrained Characteristics

Circumstances are such that she feels forced to compromise for the time being if she is to avoid being cut off from affection or from full participation.

Your Desired Objective

Wants to make a favorable impression and be rewarded as a special personality. Is therefore constantly on the watch to see whether she is succeeding in this and how others are reacting to her. this makes her feel that she is in control. Uses tactics cleverly in order to obtain influence and special recognition. Susceptible to the esthetic or original.

Your Actual Problem

Depleted vitality has created an intolerance for any further stimulation, or demands on her resources. This feeling of powerlessness subjects her to agitation and acute distress. She attempts to escape into a substitute world in which things are more nearly as she desires them to be.

Your Actual Problem #2

Greatly impressed by the unique, by originality, and by individuals of outstanding characteristics. Tries to emulate the characteristics she admires and to display originality in her own personality.

The cat may be giving me weird looks, but I'm sure he too would stand naked on the heater vent if given the opportunity.

"Are you a eunuch who's tired of the world's anti-eunuch sentiments and prejudices? Then you should move immediately to India. Not only will you be accepted in Indian society, but you could even walk down a runway as a fashion model."

DLlamar: boys suck
Styrdyst: the good ones bite too

I want to finish the tribute I started for April when she first got sick a few years ago, but I don't know how anymore not to come off sounding like a little kid's web page, "This is my cat. She's pretty and fluffy." It's kinda like having kids I guess, where you think everything they do is the most important thing in the world when no one else cares. I'd want to say things like, "How could you even think your cat is more special than mine?? April has an ink-smudged nose!" like having an ink-smudged nose makes you the most superior being. "April was called "pretty-girl" by my grandma who fed her Tender Vittles in a special dish," like she was the chosen cat of royalty. "April flew cross country twice, and hid underneath a candy machine—beat that!" I want to say... "April liked to lay on a towel at the end of my dad's bed, and if there was something on the towel, she'd lay on that—beat that!" I want to say... April made my dad love her, beat that...

12.1.99

I got a cookie.

(And this is exactly the kind of thing someone can use to prove why personal web pages are pointless waste of space.)

Happy-clicker: a pointless waste of space.

Something really interesting happened that I was going to post on happy-clicker, but it turned out to be a dream.

Clearing out old email, I find an article, "US preacher finds demon-possessed PCs"

"Demons are able to possess anything with a brain, from a chicken to a human being. And today's thinking machines have enough space on their hard drives to accommodate Satan or his pals, the paper reports.

...

The Reverend advises anyone suspecting that their computer is possessed to consult a clergyman, or, if the computer is still under warranty, to take it in for servicing."

My paycheck *still* hasn't arrived, and I'm getting angry notices from the bank....

A long long time ago I posted on bareSquare, "You know it's a bad crush when you think the way the sneeze is cute." Even worse is, "I'd rather look up your nose than ________'s."

"Glitter is forever" – Jeremy.

Blogger's been having issues lately... (should be fixed now)

And that's the reason I haven't updated in days, yeah, nothing to do with being with Andrew all weekend and away from the computer. Yeah. And that's the reason I had five hundred emails to catch up on too.

I remember a tesseract being the fifth dimension, not the fourth, from A Wrinkle In Time. Still.. wow.. toy... fun.... http://pweb.netcom.com/~hjsmith/WireFrame4/tesseract.html

bestnit: if you role play..then sex is probably not going to happen

I wonder if there are statistics on that.

It looks like I may get to go home (Indiana) for Christmas and see my mom & Scott. I hadn't planned to leave Seattle this year because I thought I'd have to pay for it... I guess I forgot how parents really work.

I just got called a "Dreamweaver master".

CyberCoder.com's salary calculator says I should be making $29/hour. Wow.

I'm looking for the website of perfect moments. This isn't it. This is a sad one. Maybe I'll have to make my own.

I collect moments.

Looks like I may have to hold off on buying those domains after all... This job's ending Friday because they just don't have the work for me they expected.

I'm cold. I hate being cold. Especially in the morning when there's a warm warm bed within reach.

Updated...

Yay! The links work right now! Over there. Links. Friends & stuff.

I

hate

javascript

rollovers

won't

work

even though i'm copying code right from my own page where they do work

I just decided I need to redesign my portfolio. Won't happen for a while, but....

test again...

test.. bad Blogger

I hear the strangest things coming out of Mitch's office... "Who's your daddy? That would be me!" just overheard.

I'm... blueberry! [link stolen from Zannah's]

Mmm ... blueberry! Tangy and sweet, you're as fresh as a mountain sunrise and as natural as homemade jam. If you were a Broadway musical, you'd be The Sound of Music – we can just picture you twirling for joy in an Alpine meadow. Best with breakfast cereal and pancakes, you're simple and refreshing, with just a touch of tartness to give you an edge. Always a favorite, people can't get enough of your spontaneous nature and easy-going approach to life. Who wouldn't be attracted to your sporty, summery flavor? Fun-loving and genuine, you're a truly tasty treat.

Presidency (was) up for bid on E-bay.

I'm trying to get those links on the side working, but Dreamweaver writes the worst Javascript... I was being lazy.

I don't get along well with fax machines... I've (hopefully) faxed my time sheets in 30 minutes before the Monday noon deadline. If all goes well, and I didn't send five blank pages, I'll even be paid this week!

"Happy-clicker, another site that takes the weekends off" ... or something.

I love getting into the elevator full of businessy-looking business people with my Evee clipped onto my backpack and handful of Red Vines.

I'm not supposed to like Bellevue, right? This little bubble I work in isn't too bad... And the company is very friendly. I like this.

A funny article about the election, a good break after reading hundreds of emails discussing it all.

*dilinger* hey
-> *dilinger* i'm resisting the urge to "mew" at you
*dilinger* good.
*dilinger* <Lurene> mew
*dilinger* * Lurene posix4 mew
*dilinger* i get enough of that in #rpi :P

Wow, someone I know was investigated by the FBI.

Okay, over the last week I've:

Not updated my web site(s).
Watched my new company pack itself up to move, got out of work early.
Had a planned three-day weekend, and an unplanned fourth.
Wasted money going to the 'Aero-Sprit' just to leave when the music gave me a headache.
Ate waffles.
Saw Pearl Jam.
Waited in line to pick up fan club tickets for two hours, missing the first band when I had been expecting to have time to buy film and eat before the show.
Was insulted by Eddie because we were all tired from standing in line for two hours.. "Boise was better than you."
Showed up at the Vogue ten minutes before closing (but I still showed up!)
'Traded' jackets with Izzy.
Ate cinnamon toast at Gryphon's. (A toaster and bread, the best of both worlds!)
Got 'kidnapped' to Redmond. (yay!)
Got moved and moved again at work.
Voted and still don't know the outcome.
Read tons and tons of email.
Went to the Vogue just to fall asleep in Andrew's lap, and watch him walk into things while dancing under the influence of cold medicine.
Saw my Chococat get stuffed in Izzy's mouth. (Wet Chococat, ewww....)
Saw my Chococat get stuffed in Azrael's mouth. (Wet Chococat, ewww....)
Saw my Chococat get stuffed down Dave's pants. (Wet Chococat, ewww....)

That about covers it.

I keep thinking: with the election to close, no matter who wins, an entire half of the country isn't going to be happy about it. Nearly 50,000,000 according to the stats on cnn.com.

I didn't sleep last night, literally, just didn't sleep. Not tired enough or something...

No posting in four days... oops :)

I'm listening to the song 'She's a Star' by James. I want to make a collection of star-based songs now. Black by Pearl Jam and Stargazer by Mother Love Bone immediately come to mind.

"James" is extremely hard to search for on Napster btw.

I was right—you can cook waffles in the oven if you don't have a toaster. (No picture this time.)

I asked NWR about what is wrong with me today... The overwhelming response is that I'm most likely hypoglycemic. If i could be 100% sure this was the case (rather than the 99% I am now), it would be great to have an actual reason behind why I get dizzy, shaky, when I don't eat often enough (which always feels like too often to be 'normal'), a reason when I have to stop and say "I have to eat, now."

But there was also a self-fulfilling prophecy in here... I waited too long to eat today (okay, my fault, but I didn't know what was going on at work with the moving and the leaving early, so I just waited until afterwards) and haven't been able to recover from that all day.

[cross posted from bareSquare]
Seattle Webgrrls may be breaking away from Webgrrls International. The decision seems to be leaning towards abandoning the Webgrrls group altogether and joining the upcoming group Digital Eve. I support the decision, but I feel displaced, losing the community I've been a part of.

As I said, I support the decision though. This has come about because the guy (yes, guy) who now has control of WI is imposing dues to benefit the for-profit organization, taking away voting rights for the local groups, and has given no sign of coming through on long-promised benefits of being a WI member. And, I'll even admit that I'm not comfortable with the idea of a man with absolute control over Webgrrls.

I know that we, locally, can do better for ourselves as a group in whatever name it takes.

Pearl Jam was my favorite band for many many years, as other music came and went in my life. I never really expected this to change... But somewhere in the time between ordering my fan club tickets and, well, yesterday, they faded... overshadowed by all the new musical influences in my life. I bought the new album as expected of any good fan, along with three Cure CDs. I listened to the Cure..... I feel like a traitor to my own 'favorite' band.

Also in those months between, I forgot how soon in November the show was. It's great luck that I looked it up when I did, "It's Sunday!?" I'm sure the show will be amazing, even if I don't know any of the new songs.

Oh yeah, I'm supposed to see Pearl Jam sunday. I almost forgot all about it.

Updated: beautiful things

Two whole mailing list posts in one day—that must be some kind of record for me.

I just found something I don't hate about Bellevue. I was just walking through a pile of dry leaves on the side of the street, surrounded by that wonderful autummy smell. It reminded me of Maine this time of year (even though I hate Maine too... oh well, there had to be some good memories there... I think...) Then I realized I was supposed to have turned a block ago, nearly lost as usual..

I keep getting the song Just Like Heaven stuck in my head. Happy happy music. *bounce*

Last night my favorite DJ asks me what I want to hear. "I want to hear happy Cure songs," I said.
"They made those?"

[at work] 'Montessori House of Children' sounds like a restaurant to me.

I haven't even figured out what this site is yet, but it had me laughing so hard I had to change screens to stop.